Remembering the parachute

Well. I went 0-4 with camp applications. Pine Cove, Sky Ranch, T Bar M, and Laity Lodge all gave me a resounding no. With each rejection, I felt a little less confident and a little more insignificant. Over the span of October to February, I was reminded 4 times that I wasn't supposed to work at a camp this summer.

Initially, I took it as an "you're not good enough" message.

However, I know that isn't true. God just doesn't want me at a camp this summer. Why? I don't know quite yet. Still waiting on that one. But I'm confident in my worth both here (as in, earth) and in the eyes of the Lord. Do the rejections still hurt? Uh, yeah. They still have a hold of me. Maybe on the arm or foot and it might not be too strong, but it's there and it's not going to go away soon.

Earlier this week, I felt like I'd just been pushed out of a plane and into a complete free fall, headed straight to the ground with no hope of survival. Flailing and screaming until I was hoarse, I was entirely unable to save myself from certain death.

Then the lightbulb lit up and I realized that there was something on my back. A parachute. It'd been there the whole time and I had no idea. I was rejecting the thought that there'd been one because I was so wrapped up in what was going on. I was accepting my fate without questioning it and looking for a way out. I had given up. 


Prematurely, mind you. But when I pulled that release and seconds later felt the pull of a parachute, I breathed a sigh of relief. I was safe. I was alive. The landing might cause be rough, sure. My heart was still racing. But I wasn't about to go splat. The security of a parachute quite literally had my back.

So what was my "parachute" this week? Jeremiah 29. Go get your Bible or Google it or whatever. Just read it. Find a way to read it. And don't accept yourself as a failure, because that only leads to a devastating free fall that ends in destruction. Know what you've got and know Who is on your side.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD. "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all of your heart. I will be found by you," declares the LORD. "And I will bring you back from captivity." Jeremiah 29:11-14a