Yes, reader, that is the sad truth I've been reminded of.
My time at Texas A&M University is at it's halfway point and year three is fast approaching. 27 more days of claiming junior privileges but not wanting to accept the fact that I am now a scary, knowledgeable upperclassman. I shudder at the very thought.
But the fact of the matter is that time is still hurtling forward, full speed ahead. Fears like "Am I going to get a job after college?", "Will I get to student teach near College Station?", and "Is Alabama going to crush us this year in football?" keep swarming into my mind. I keep casting my eyes onto a horizon that I can't see (despite the fact that I'm severely farsighted). And the inability to know what lies ahead is a little disturbing.
The book of Matthew assures us that tomorrow has it's own worries and that we'll get there when we get there. But I can say that verse all day and dream about it all night. When will it kick into effect? I'm already worried my Delta Gad freshman will think I'm a total psycho when I'm not even finished hanging out with my VRBC nuggets. I'm concerned for my lack of plans pertaining to next summer when this summer hasn't even shut down yet.
I know all the right answers.
Why can't I execute it then? Why is my life sounding like a math problem I can't figure out?
Possibly because I'm small and stupid, insecure and uninformed. Things I used to view as shameful and weak, but that are actually comforting. If you know where to look. 2 Corinthians 12:9 has been a brilliant verse for me--reminding me that I am weaker than weak. Studying Ephesians this summer has brought to light how deeply loved I am and how there truly is a plan for me. Linley. It's not generic and it's not flippant. It was designed specifically for me and my strengths and my flaws.
I wish I could say that I'm ready for junior year and to bring it on. But really, I just want to focus on what's right in front of me. And when planning for the future is right in front of me, then I will do what I need to. But when that time comes, I know I will be equipped with what I need and supported by who needs to support me. I'm confident in the God who protects and loves me and by the family and friends who will stand by me.
So, Impact, junior year, Crimson Tide? Hi. I'm Linley. I'm not 100% sure where my life is going, but I'm 100% sure of the things I need to know right now. The rest will come when in due time.
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