Be Bold.

On a scale from one to ten, I used to be about a 4 on the boldness scale. I'd talk to people and make conversation, but I wasn't ever really one to stand up for myself and proclaim my opinions in front of large groups of people. I was (and still am) very agreeable and hated any form of confrontation. There's nothing wrong with any of this. Different people have different personalities.

I am a different person now. Though I am still very much Linley, I am absolutely not the exact same girl I was five years ago, or even a year ago. I've changed because of things that I've gone through and how I reacted to them. My relationship with my Creator has increased tenfold. I'm smarter, louder, more of a leader, and, above all, happier. I'm joyful. 


Christ has given me everything I could ever need. And, in turn, I need to put everything out there for Him.

I need to be bold.

86:12 was a part of a ministry called simply "Prayer Stations". Basically, we would stop people on the busy streets of one of the most unfriendly places in the world and ask if we can pray with them. As in, stop and talk to God in the middle of the sidewalk by Madison Square Garden with a complete stranger. In New York City.

The night before I was supposed to go out onto the streets, I had just heard story after story of how people were yelled at and how it was the worst experience of their lives and how they hated every single minute of the three hours they stood on the street corner. I was told to go into the situation with a negative expectation and that I won't have anyone say yes to me. I was so frustrated and angry with the whole deal that I went to my dorm and cried, not at all looking forward to what tomorrow had in store for me.

Talk about rejection, rudeness, being cussed out, being ignored, and feeling like the most insignificant person on the planet. We got more rejection than we got "Yeah, I'll pray with you"s. Marginally more. When I asked a man, he asked why I was bothering him and then snapped "No, you can't pray for me" before stomping across the street. I responded with "OKAY HAVE A GREAT DAY. GOD BLESS!" and attempted to not be spiteful about it. With limited success. I got a lot of quiet rejections, like shaking heads and "No thank you"s. But I got a lot of yeses. A weird amount. I prayed with a total of about 12 people, but probably 10 or so others said that they wanted to but didn't have time, so they gave me their name and what I could pray for them about.

Most were surprised when I asked if I could pray with them. I mean, I would be. The whole morning I was asking myself if I would say yes or not if someone stopped me on the street. Now, I know I would. After seeing how hard it is to dig up the courage to approach someone, I won't short anyone anything when it comes to impromptu street conversations.

None of my conversations were life-changing. I prayed for a lot of job opportunities and interviews. One guy had a brain injury. A few just asked for general prayers. The second woman I talked to (my first "yes") gushed "Oh my gosh, yes, I would love for someone to pray with me; this is exactly what I needed right now." I had a few awesome conversations with people and a few brief ones that made me smile. I saw the best and the worst of New York that day.

I realized that old me would have been shaking in her Nikes over the concept. My stomach would be doing backflips. And yet I somehow was given the boldness and the bravery to show prove to myself that I can proudly proclaim the name of my Savior to total strangers in an unforgiving city. I know that I am changed and prayer stations has given me the courage to push on and to know that I can be loud with my faith. People will accept it and reject with with equal amounts of passion. My only job is to be bold and to glorify my Savior with how I shout out His praise.

*Disclaimer: I will not be annoying. I did not run after people, yelling "Pray with me or burn!". I was kind and calm. I did not show fear but I did not show arrogance. I was myself. Bolder, yes. But still Linley.

The confrontation fear melted away that day. The fear of being rejected for my faith evaporated. God pulled off my protective shell and made me vulnerable to Him; I couldn't do that on my own. That shell was like Spiderman's creepy black suit that made him bad in the 3rd movie. It just kept sticking to me and I couldn't shake it, partly because I didn't want to shake it. It was comfortable and kept me safe, most of the time. But the shell was a bullet-proof vest in a war zone. I need a tank. God is my tank.

I wore a Rangers backpack all week and got some frowns. That was boldness on a worldly (but very fun) level. No one can say I was afraid of those Yankees. I had unlikely conversations with unlikely people that turned out to be divine appointments that I'm glad I didn't miss. We won't say more than that on the topic though.

I'm still afraid of a lot of things; that won't ever change. But I'm being held by the Maker of the universe. Being bold is just part of the deal. I still have a lot of things I need to be working on, but those will come with time and a lot of investment in my Lord. But they will come. Because He is with me until the very end of the age (Matthew 28).

Be loud. Be proud. Be bold.

"For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline." 2 Timothy 1:7